Another trip down memory lane...

I have been searching, finding and typing up my old poems for the book this week. I wasn't going to add them at first - and they may still not make the cut - but I have to include them in this phase of writing. Plus it's nice to get them off of paper and into the computer.


I find myself saying over and over "If only I had Microsoft Office instead of Open Office". Open office was free tho and Microsoft Office, as we all know , is not.  So for now I use the bare bones Open Office to write. Problem being, nothing recognizes the open office file names. So I can't even up date my resume, let alone transfer my book into a program. I am hoping that when I eventually get Microsoft Office, I can just cut and paste from what I have typed up so far directly into Word. It's either that or I start looking for writers software.  Hmmm, well anyway, sorry, I digress. 


Poems are what we're talking about. So here is a piece of one, that I wrote in October of '96. It's actually quote romantic as I read it again. And funnily enough... wait - is "funnily"  a word? hmm maybe I should say  - And oddly enough, these words still ring true to me today. It's what I search for when I am in a relationship. It's what will rock my world when I find it.

  " I've never even touched you,

but if I close my eyes and see with my heart,

  I know exactly how you feel.

I hear your voice

  and I feel as if I have heard it forever.

You are so new to me, 

  but you're not.

I think my heart knew you,

  before I even saw your face."

~Stacey Gates Charter

Day 14 of 30 day BC - Someone I could'nt do without...

Day 14 - post a picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.


Well duh! This is an easy one. Tho of course there are many people I couldn't imagine a life without - family and friends - I am a mom. Which means that my kid is the answer to this question.

Kelly- aka the kid

I don't even think I need to explain. Love you Kel! xoxxo~Mom

Day 13 of 30 day BC - My favorite band or artist

Day 13 - Post a picture of your favorite band or artist.


Wow - how do  you pick one? It's so hard. Right now I am big big fan of Mumford and Sons

Thier album - Sigh No More - is a main stay in my cd player. Yes , I said cd player. I do not own an Ipod or mp3 player. Soooo behind the times I am. I have posted about them before and also posted their videos but what the heall - here's another one.



All time favorites, since my go to at the moment stuff ranges from Eminem, to Evanesence and Adele and Sara Barielles, would be Counting Crows and Dave Matthews Band


Counting Crows album August and Everything after is my absolute- stranded on a desert island with only one cd-favorite. I actually have bought 3 over the years because they get scratched or worn out. now that's love LOL

Here's a video for Anna Begins. One of my favorites. It's a fan video but the song is there...I am guessing they never released an original video for this one.



Dave Matthews Band - pretty much anything they do I love. 

Here's a video of one of my favorites

Day 12 of 30 day BC - Something I Love

Day 12 - Post a picture of something you love.


Let me point out it states "something" not someone... so that said here's my picture...

My Books

Yes we have talked about my love for my Kindle. And it's true, but my true love is actual books. Me walking into a discount bookstore with some money in my pocket is like a kid in a candy store. I go thru phases with what kind of books I like, but I try to read a bit of everything. 

I love having a pile of books just waiting for me to get to, biography, true crime, historical, fiction, mystery, chick lit. Right now I am reading...

It's a contemporary mystery/romance/vampire/chick lit. Funny, creepy and fun. A newer author who self publishes (YAY HER!) and she's got a great voice.

Waiting on my shelf for me to read is this one...

Bob Newhart's autobiography. I just love him, always have and I can't wait to see how his dry humor translates into book form.

One of my all time favorite books that I have actually read 3 times and am ready to read again is...

Crusie is one of those authors I try to read all the time. I actually just bought a four pack of her older books that I hadn't read yet, for my kindle. This book... if you haven't read it, please do. You are in the book, laughing, eating, drinking, loving, right along with each one of her characters.

A book I couldn't wait to read that I think I devoured in 2 days once I got it was ...

A true story about the infamous Vidocq Society - from Wikipedia -The Vidocq Society is a members-only crime-solving club that meets on the third Thursday of every month in Philadelphia,Pennsylvania.

The Vidocq Society is named for Eugène François Vidocq, the ground-breaking nineteenth century French detective who helped police by using the psychology of the criminal to solve "cold case" homicides. Vidocq was a former criminal himself, and used his knowledge of the criminal mind to look at murder from the psychological perspective of the perpetrator. At meetings, Vidocq Society Members (VSMs) listen to local law enforcement officials from around the world who bring in cold cases for review.

VSMs are forensic professionals; current and former FBI profilers, homicide investigators, scientists, psychologists, prosecutors and coroners who use their experience to provide justice for investigations that have gone cold. Members are selected by committee invitation only, pay a $100 annual fee, and commit to attend at least one meeting per year.

If you are a true crime buff, like CSI or Court TV shows (TRUTV now) this book will be something you will love. For me, who in a different life would be a forensic psychologist, it was like a bible of sorts. Amazing!

A book i wait for every year is Janet Evanovich's next installment of her Stephanie Plum Series. Next up is Number 17...

And yes, I have read all 16 that came before this one. And i will be first in line when book one becomes the movie and is released on July 8th this year. Do you read Janet? I wasn't thrilled with who they picked for all the cast but am now on board... 

here's Connie, Stephanie and Lulu

And one of my favorite actors - Jason O'Mara is playing Joe Morelli -

Yummy!!

And what would a summer vacation at the beach be without a James Patterson book to read...

So welcome to my world of books. My true loves...

Need some CUTENESS up in this hizzous

Blecchhh! That last post has left me a nasty taste in my mouth and quite possibly my psyche. Don't like the vibe or the taste so I will now overload you with cuteness. Cute kittens, singing dogs, laughing babies and a Mayhem commercial just because.


Let the warm and fuzzies begin...

KITTIES...

and PUPPIES...



and LAUGHING BABIES, Oh My!



Ahhhhhh that feels so much better! <3


Oops... forgot your Mayhem commercial... here ya go!

Day 11 of 30 day BC - Something I hate

Day 11 - Post a picture of something you hate.


Hate is a strong word. I try not to let myself feel that emotion - strongly dislike is better. Hate is sorta self destructive. That said, I hate clowns! But I sure as hell was not going to spend time on google looking for clown pictures. I mean really.... anxiety attack anyone?


I also hate prejudice. Bigots and homophobes and racists - oh my. But how do you find a picture of that?


I hate violence against women. Wife-beaters, girl hitters, abusive, controlling pricks. but who wants to see a picture of that?


So I decided I would post a picture of something that relates to all 3 of these things - a picture of the homophobic, women-hating clowns from Westboro Baptist church. You know them... they are the ones that picket at military funerals and police funerals and even children's funerals. The ones that say God hates us all , blah blah blah. These folks are the bottom of the bottom. So here ya go a picture of something I hate!

I feel dirty and wrong just writing about them. 

Day 10 of 30 day bc - The person i get in the most trouble with...

Day 10 - post a picture of the person you do the most messed up stuff with.


Day 10 annnnnndddd i think I may be finally caught up. So I can go back to one post a day plus my regular blog. My book is lonely waiting for me to write more of it LOL. 


So I have to admit - I really don't do too much "messed up" stuff any more - actually I never really did. So I am going to change this challenge day a little. I have had some late night drunken fun with my friends so I thought I would post some of them up here. Not really messed up stuff but it'll work. 


So you've all met Bob, Kent, my cousin Barb and Vern and Jeff. Here's some other folks I am proud to call friends that I may have had a beer or two with thru out the days...(sarcasm font needed again for that beer or two line )

Jimmy and Alex Bilotta

Many a late, late night has been spent with the Bilotta's at the Blarney Stone. Sometimes together, sometimes individual, but always a great time! 

At the Bilotta bar

They don't call the stone wall outside of the Blarney the Bilotta Bar for nothing and I am officially too old to drink outside until 5am... but I still do it sometimes anyway.

Me and Alex

And their wedding? Filled with late night hijinks. The Mendenhall had no idea what they were in for.

Dave, Nicole, Missi, Steve and Ron

Oh boy this crew is trouble just waiting to happen. Back in the day when Missi was dating Steve and Nicole and I were out all the time (pre meeting Dave) we were a force to be reckoned with. Late night stalker drive by's and girls nights with one of us Dj'ing our cd's (now Ipods) and discussing the meaning behind each song. Damn we had some serious fun. I miss those days but love that my girls are happy and in love.

Me, Aimee and Nicole

When Aimee turned 21 she got into the mix and has become over the years, the DJ MixMaster. So add her into the crew above as well. Love me some girl nights!

The Blarney stone girls - circa 2000

Leigh, Me, Sue, Dana,Ashley & Stacy O (becky's missing form this pic)

And speaking of Old School and Back in the day - here's the crew from the Blarney Stone when we all worked there in 2000,2001. No one has more fun then servers and bartenders when they get together. All these single ladies (not counting Stacy O on the right end) are now married and most have babies too. (not rushing you dana...LOL)

I can't forget Joe O

many a fun night with Joe - whether he's behind the bar serving, in the bar stool drinking or way back in the day... cooking wings while me, Becky, Dana or Ashley were serving.

Pete and Bobby O

And hell since we're back in the day, many a night of trouble with these two was had. Ahhh Good times.

Carrie and Mike

It's not a football game, a New Years Eve or a random friday without including Mike and Carrrie in the mix. I'd put Petey up here too but he's shy! I've had some great times and many a car bomb with this beautiful couple!

Janet and Mike

Coming back to present day with Janet and Mike. Many a fun late night, sporting event or quizzo game with this wonderful couple too!

Did someone say carbomb's Janet?

Tami and Me

Ahhhh my girl Tami. when we go out, it's always a good time and even when we stay in we have fun. she's heading to the beach with us for Oscars this year also. An Oscars Weekend virgin... Look for some good pics! Love you Tami!

Jenn, me and Doug

Many a fun time with these two lovebirds. One of my favorite couples and I love going out and catching up with them. Tho they never stay out too late... ahhh to be young and in love LOL. 

Me and Dre

Last but certainly not least is my girl Dre. We behave when we go out but we do have some fun.  

So there's a partial cast of characters that I have a ball (or used to have) a ball with. Actually I guess I could have done this and just put up one picture of the Blarney Stone... 

But that wouldn't have been as much fun.

PS: if you think I left your picture out (don ruberti) it's only because I don't have one. LOL

Day 9 of the 30 day BC - the person who's gotten me thru the most

Day 9 - Post a picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.


Ahhhh friends. where would we be without them. i have been blessed, in my life, to have some really fantastic friends. Old and new friends that I know would always have my back if I needed them. So this one was a good one for me. I think the person who has gotten me thru the most stuff that's happened to me has been my friend Bob Lacy! Or as my mom would say  "Oh that Bob, I just love him!!"

 My boo, Bob

I still remember the day we met... another blarney chance meeting. It was friend love at first sight. He is the person that brought Kent into my life. He's the one who introduced to to the boy I was in love with for 6 years - the same boy I loved who took me to New York. It was Bob's birthday party back in 2002 where that boy and I met. He also brought another love into my life

Keesha

Our dog Keesha. She was Bob's baby first, and then I adopted her when his dad became ill. The little princess who was our baby! RIP sweet Kiki.

This is the man that still and will always bare the scar from the night of my attack. When his hand got slammed in the door as my attacker was trying to break back in to get me. If it wasn't for Bob I might not have made it thru that night... I know that in my heart and soul. And then days later, when I was broken and on the floor crying, at my lowest, it was Bob who came over to my house and kicked me in the ass to get me up. It was Bob who went to court with me and held my hand thru it all- Helped me thru a years worth of stalking and when I had to disappear.

And that's just one of the times - he's been there for me thru break ups and heartbreaks. Thru job layoffs and family emergencies, and loss. Just as I have been there for him. And we have been there for each other to celebrate all the good things in our lives as well. 

My friend, my brother, my soulmate, my bestie, my boo...My Bob! I love you!!!

Oh Yay, it's Valentine's Day...UGH!

yeah this pretty much sums it up

So joy oh joy it's Valentines day. Isn't that special! (they really do need to come up with a sarcasm font) In all my 47 years i don't think I've ever really had a good one. When I was married, my husband wasn't a big romantic so we treated it like any other day. Well he did anyway. Since the divorce, I usually was single or dating someone (like last year) who really couldn't give two shits about celebrating with me. Tho if i remember correctly, I believe he told me he bought something for his soon to be ex-wife... yeah nice guy right? Guess that's why he decided to forget the divorce and stay married.

I do remember  1 very nice dinner with an ex-boyfriend that I was still friends with... I love a long dinner. Drinks before then good food, good conversation... some more drinks after. Great restaurant... So there was one nice Valentines day LOL. 

I know I sound bitter and I shouldn't but really, if you're gonna be bitter, what better day to be it. (wow say that sentence 5 times fast haha) I usually keep that bitter side of myself in the dusty corner but when you are single and consistently force fed everything love for weeks and then have to go thru the day while everyone celebrates it ... well it's kinda sucky.

The positive side of me that usually wins is telling me to celebrate Love in every form today. Loving myself, celebrating myself , is a healthier way to look at this day.

“You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy.”~anon

I mean really, it's what I write about, it's what I counsel others to do thru my words...

Don't rely on someone else for your happiness and self worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can't love and respect yourself - no one else will be able to make that happen.~Stacey Gates Charter

Again, I guess, that is the contradiction that is me. I strive every day to love myself.  I know that I will not find someone else to love me, unless I truly love myself first .  Believe me, I like the hearts and flowers and pinks and reds of the day... but it's easier to say Valentines day Sucks, then it is to say, I am alone and lonely... again.

So allow me, dear readers, my one day of bitter and I promise on the remaining 364 days of the year I will aspire to love myself positively and spread the word  of  healthy self love and respect.  

I do send you all love and flowers this day and hope that you are spending it in a way that makes your heart happy.

I leave you with something I wrote a while ago... that may further explain the ying and the yang of love. The desire to be loved, but the fear of it as well.

Happy Day!

Everyday we are locked

in a constant battle for our hearts.

We build wall after wall,

like protective armor,

that we hope will keep us safe.

But then spend all of our time

looking for someone who can

break down all the barriers

and set us free.

That ever elusive freedom...

that possession of our hearts.

It's our deepest desire

and yet also our most soul wrenching fear. ~Stacey Gates Charter

Day 8 of 30 day BC - A picture that makes me laugh

Day 8 - Post a picture that makes you laugh.


Ahhh a personal picture that never ever fails to make me laugh. There is actually 2 of them and they have the same person in both of them. That person would be one of my best friends, Kent.

Pic # 1 - 
yes, that would be Kent, Halloween 2002, dressed as a clown. We had a halloween party in the clubhouse and he decided to surprise me. Look at my face! Think I was surprised?? LOL  Yeah every time I see this I cringe from the clown face and then laugh at mine. And at Kent being such a fool.

Pic #2 -
 HAhahahaha! This one, summer of 2006 and we were at the shore. We had gone down to my friend Nicole's beach house in Ocean City , New Jersey and on this night had been out at an outside bar somewhere off of 9 in the shore area - Wildwood maybe?. Don't remember where tho. My summer of Nirvana - I was working for SMRG as a marketing coordinator and driving a black Mercedes as my company car. This is Kent in the back seat, seat dancing to Christina Aguliara - Ain't no other man ! My God, I remember this like it was yesterday... and I still laugh every single time I think about it. 


Kent never fails to make me laugh! I am lucky friend!


Oh and cause I know you won't be able to sit still when this song plays either, here it is... enjoy the jam!

Day 7 of 30 day BC - My most treasured item

Day 7 - post a picture of your most treasured item.


Keeping in mind that it says ITEM, I have to say my most treasured item or possession is my Toshiba Laptop Computer.

 As a writer, who writes whenever the mood strikes, I needed something portable. I got this for a great price in December 09 and love it. I am wireless in the house and can write in my living room or my bed. I take it with me to the beach and piggy back on a free signal so I can be online down there as well. I do every thing - pay bills, work, communicate,shop, have fun playing games, on my laptop! 

Followed closely by my Kindle - I definitely say that this laptop is my most treasured item.

Day 6 of 30 day bc - who I would trade places w/ for 1 day

Day 6 - Post a picture of a person you would love to trade places with for one day.


An easy one, as I always say I want to be her when I grow up. I would trade places with Amy Lee from Evanescence.

I mean seriously... look at her! I want a day in that body, with that voice and that money. And man would I have fun!