Thursday, July 28, 2011

Dancing with myself...

Sooo I am heading halfway thru my 2nd full week here on my own. Of course this past weekend, my friend Don was here w/ his best friend Joe. So I met up with them on Friday and Sunday. SOooo much fun! 

Then my dad was here from Thursday thru Saturday so I got to cook dinner for him one night and then he took me to dinner the next.
BUT this week, I am a bit homesick.
 “Homesickness is. . . absolutely nothing. Fifty percent of the people in the world are homesick all the time. You don't really long for another country. You long for something in yourself that you don't have, or haven't been able to find.”~Anon

I've been stressed about money and jobs and in between all that I've started really missing, as the quote above says, my family and friends. Not my apartment or West Chester but something I haven't found down here... people to hang out with. Actually more than that , I miss my people to hang out with... I am a little bit lonely.
Amiee and Nicole


Jenn and Doug


Kelly and Colleen

Bob and Barb

Vern and Jeffie


Every house where love abides
And friendship is a guest,
Is surely home, and home sweet home
For there the heart can rest.
~Henry Van Dyke

It is a curious emotion, this certain homesickness…   we are torn between a nostalgia for the familiar and an urge for the foreign and strange. As often as not, we are homesick most for the places we have never known.

~ Carson McCullers

Then I found this in a post I wrote in December of last year-
And so as this January roles around, and I put Christmas behind me again, I find an excitement for what's to come. Not a sadness at a another year gone by, but pride at what I have been able to accomplish. I've learned that change is good and freeing and healthy! I have an undeniable sense that the best is yet to come and it's just waiting for me to find it. And find it I will. 
So bring on 2011... it's gonna be fantastic!

I will admit that I am proud of myself and what i have accomplished. I proved to myself that 
anything is possible if you want it badly enough. I think that once I get a job (and believe me
I am applying non stop) and meet some people I will feel a bit better. i still know that I made 
the right decision by moving. I still feel that I am exactly where i belong. I have come 
"home" and i own my own place and it is coming together beautifully.

But at 47 years old... I still miss my mom. LOL I guess that all means that I am a blessed
person. i have enough people in my life that i love, and that love me, that I am missing them.

Mom and Dad

And then I go to the beach and it's quiet and beautiful and I float in the warm water of the inlet and I am at peace. I sit on my chair in the sand and watch a school of dolphin playing out in the water and I realize this is what people dream of. This is what people say they want and never get. Somehow I have been lucky enough and determined enough and blessed enough 
to not only find my bliss but to live it.

And that's when i realize, when I know deep in my beach loving soul, that all will work out and it will be wonderful.